Https The-Happiness-Index.Com Getting-The-Most-Out-Of-Negative-Reviews How Fair Is Your Life?

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How Fair Is Your Life?

I think we all have some experience with that friend who always orders the most expensive item on the menu, who isn’t on time to pay for anyone’s coffee or who disappears to the bathroom when it’s their round. Or the businessman who quotes but doesn’t deliver, or the golden boy who can do no wrong.

Many situations in life can appear unfair, that we are marginalized or disrespected. But just because we’ve been there a long time doesn’t mean we’ll get the next promotion, just because we’ve spent a lot of time and effort baking a cake means it’s going to be pretty, or even edible. !

How can we avoid becoming aggrieved, hurt or discouraged when we feel rejected, rejected or belittled, when every part of us cries, ‘how fair is our life?’

– We may see people who are better or worse than us and think ‘why me?’ or even ‘why not me?’ But life is not always fair and even those who seem to have everything in life always have their own challenges and crosses to bear.

– Accept that not every decision, situation or choice is made about you. There are always many other factors that influence the actions of others and few are directly related to you.

– Do you almost unwittingly give permission for unfair things to happen to you? We all have a personal responsibility to say how we feel, disagree or at least comment when things happen that make us unhappy. Discussing feedback, saying ‘we need to talk’ can provide an opportunity to discover how other people view the situation and how they might handle things. Mutual understanding makes for better understanding.

– Keep a mental or even physical record of your achievements. If you feel that you are in the middle of a lot of unfairness, stop and remind yourself of all your achievements and positive actions in the last few months, the breaks that have come to you.

I remember a time when professional CV writers were brought in by a large organization I used to work for. They are there to help any staff who are under threat of redundancy. When I read mine I did not at first recognize myself in it! They wrote very well. It’s easy to ignore or gloss over what we’re good at but equally, when we’re treated unfairly rather than focusing on the negative we need to remind ourselves of our many different capabilities and talents.

– Surround yourself with good friends, fans and ambassadors, people who recognize your value and are happy to support you. Negative people work as drains, draining energy and joy from our lives. Inject happiness, in the form of positive people who like, respect and encourage you, people who sometimes push you, but who do everything with love and affection.

– Do the things you know you’re good at. You may have a wonderful way with people, children, animals, you may be good at sports, music, gardening, DIY. Doing things that boost your self-esteem and confidence will help you look beyond any immediate unfairness or negativity and instead treat that as a minor annoyance that won’t affect your mood. or motivation level.

– Accept praise and admiration. How often do we listen to criticism or negative words, even if it comes from a lone voice in a sea of ​​compliments and good wishes. It can be automatic to ignore many comments about our positive efforts and contributions, perhaps suspecting that others are being polite or not really meaning what they say. While self-deprecation has its place, there are times, especially in potentially unfair situations, when it’s important to accept positive feedback.

– Tell others what you’ve done, not in a big-headed or arrogant way, but let them see your input, the time and effort you’ve invested. It can be easy to assume that others already know what we’ve been through, the obstacles we’ve navigated and overcome. However, this does not always happen. Allow others to be attracted to you, to value your skills, talents and strengths and to follow-up with appropriate praise and recognition.

– Why not highlight the unfair behavior of other people? They may be so used to taking advantage, shorting your investment, treating you badly, that they don’t realize how bad their behavior is. Call them by recapping and reminding them about your original agreement or setup, excluding them from future plans, or saying, ‘you deal with it, it’s your turn now!’ can provide an important wake-up call.

And remember that perspective is key to how we react and respond to life’s experiences. One person may feel victimized and singled out, while another may not care or even notice how they are being treated. When we are too tired or stressed we tend to be more sensitive to negative things that happen to us and have a low level of tolerance. Practice good self-care, stress management and slowly you will realize that you don’t know if your life is ‘fair’ or not.

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